Are you ready to own a dog?
Here's the dog-owner's mantra, read it CAREFULLY:
A dog is a living thing.
A dog is a living thing.
A dog is a living thing.
Got it? No? Here it goes:
A dog is a living thing.
A dog is a living thing.
A dog is a living thing.
If you want a dog because you think it'll look great in that new BMW you just bought at 12% interest, think how much fun it will be when it tears up the leather upholstery so thoroughly that even the repo man is impressed. This isn't like buying a new pair of shoes. It's closer to having a child: A child that doesn't speak English and occasionally eats poop. If that thought sends you screaming from the room, consider another kind of pet like maybe a fish or a plant or a pair of shoes.
Repeat the mantra a few more times.
A dog is a living thing.
A dog is a living thing.
A dog is a living thing.
If you work from 8 a.m. to 10 p.m. six days a week, you're going to have a lonely, unhappy dog on your hands. And how do dogs show their unhappiness? In the absence of being able to say, "Pay attention to me, Poindexter," they'll do things like pee on your high school yearbook or methodically eat all your CDs. This isn't their fault.
All together now -
A dog is a living thing.
A dog is a living thing.
A dog is a living thing.
Here's a little "pup quiz" that will help determine if you are ready to add one more member to the family. Answer "yes" or "no" to the following questions:
- Do you like dogs? I mean do you REALLY LIKE dogs?
- Does the health of your household allow for a pet dog? (Allergies, etc.)
- Does your building allow dogs?
- Are you financially secured?
- Are you OK with picking up dog poop, mopping up dog pee, or cleaning up dog vomit?
If you answered "no" to anyone of these, then you're probably not ready to become a dog owner. That's OK though... you're still allowed to like them.
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